Tag: intervention

What Parents Need to Know when Disability Impacts Behavior and Discipline at School

Posted on by Nicol Walsh

This article includes: Information that you can view, download and print

Behavior is a form of communication. When a student struggles with behavior at school, it may be a sign that they need additional support, services, accommodations, or instruction. For students with disabilities, schools must look beyond discipline and consider what will help the student participate meaningfully in school. Repeated requests for early pickup, shortened school days, suspensions, or other lost instructional time can be signs that a different approach is needed to keep the student engaged in learning and making progress at school.

A Brief Overview

  • Behavior support can be part of a student’s right to Free Appropriate Public Education (FAPE).
  • Schools must consider a student’s disability-related needs when behavior affects learning.
  • Repeated requests for early pickup, shortened school days, suspensions, or other lost instructional time can be signs that a different approach is needed to keep a student engaged in learning and making progress at school.
  • Families can request evaluations, school meetings, and the development or revision of behavioral supports.
  • Students continue to have educational rights during disciplinary removals.
  • Families have the right to ask questions, request records, and seek review or appeal when they disagree with discipline decisions.

Introduction

This article explains how school discipline can overlap with disability rights when behavior is connected to a student’s disability, trauma, or unmet support needs. It focuses on these practical questions:

  • When should families ask for evaluation or behavior support?
  • What counts as a removal from school?
  • What must schools consider before relying on suspension, expulsion, shortened school days, or other removals?
  • What rights do students and families have when they disagree with discipline decisions?

When Is Behavior a Sign That More Support Is Needed?

Students with disabilities have the right to the supports and services they need to learn and participate in school, a protection known as Free Appropriate Public Education (FAPE). Guidance from the Office for Civil Rights (OCR) explains that FAPE includes services, supports, and accommodations designed to meet a student’s individual needs, as well as training for school staff so they understand those needs and can effectively implement the student’s supports.

When behavior affects learning, participation, or access to instruction, schools should consider what additional supports, accommodations, services, instruction, or interventions may be needed. The goal is not simply to stop a behavior, but to understand what the behavior may be communicating and identify strategies that help the student succeed.

Behavior supports can take many forms, including:

  • Accommodations
  • Counseling or behavioral health services
  • Social-emotional instruction
  • Positive behavioral supports
  • Changes to an Individualized Education Program (IEP) or Section 504 Plan
  • Behavioral assessment and planning

Schools are required to provide education and support before resorting to discipline for children who struggle with behavior because of their impairments. According to OCR, individualized behavioral supports may include counseling, school social worker services, school-based mental health services, physical activity, and opportunities for a student to visit a counselor or behavioral coach when they need time and space to self-regulate. Counseling and other behavioral health supports can also be written into an IEP as related services when educationally necessary for FAPE.

When Should Families Ask for an Evaluation, Functional Behavior Assessment (FBA), or Behavioral Intervention Plan (BIP)?

An evaluation can be requested at any time if a disability may be affecting a child’s education. Schools also have a responsibility to evaluate when there is reason to suspect a disability is affecting learning, behavior, attendance, or participation in school.

An evaluation or school meeting may be helpful if:

  • A student is frequently suspended.
  • A student is often sent home because of behavior.
  • Behavior is interfering with learning.
  • Existing supports are not working.
  • School staff report ongoing concerns.
  • Instructional time is being lost because of behavior-related issues.

Section 504 does not limit the number of evaluations a student may reasonably request or receive. OCR guidance states that families may request an evaluation at any time and at public expense. Schools also have a responsibility to evaluate when there is reason to believe a disability is affecting a student’s education, known as Child Find.

A Functional Behavioral Assessment (FBA) is a type of evaluation used to better understand the reasons behind challenging behaviors and identify strategies that may help. An FBA is not required before asking for behavior supports. The IEP or 504 team can discuss behavior concerns, review existing supports, and consider changes to a student’s IEP, 504 Plan, or behavior supports at any time. PAVE offers a Sample Letter to Request a Functional Behavioral Assessment, available for download in multiple languages.

One type of behavior support is a Behavior Intervention Plan (BIP). A BIP is a working document that the school and family develop together and review regularly to help a student succeed at school. It focuses on positive supports, skill building, and encouragement rather than punishment.

A BIP may include strategies to:

  • Teach new skills and replacement behaviors
  • Increase positive supports and reinforcement
  • Reduce barriers to learning and participation
  • Prevent future challenges and escalation.

The information gathered through an FBA can be used to develop, review, or revise a BIP when current strategies are not meeting a student’s needs.

More information about participating in the FBA/BIP process is available in PAVE’s video training, Behavior and School: How to Participate in the FBA/BIP Process.

What Happens When Behavior Leads to Discipline?

Washington’s student-discipline rules encourage schools to keep students connected to learning whenever possible and to use responses that are fair and consistent. In 2025, the Office of Superintendent of Public Instruction (OSPI) updated the student-discipline rules and added a definition for discretionary discipline, which refers to situations where school staff have flexibility in choosing how to respond to behavior. Rather than using the same consequence every time, staff may consider the circumstances before deciding on a response.

A student may be removed from a classroom, instructional area, or activity when behavior substantially disrupts learning or creates safety concerns. This type of action is often called a classroom exclusion (WAC 392-400) Time away from the classroom may last for the remainder of the school day, up to the following two school days, or until the teacher and principal (or designee) have met, whichever occurs first. If the exclusion extends beyond those limits, it may be considered a suspension and additional requirements may apply.

District policies must include procedures for informing parents when classroom exclusions occur. Notification must be provided in a language families can understand.

Questions to consider include:

  • Why was the student removed?
  • How long will the exclusion last?
  • What support will help the student return successfully?
  • How is the removal being documented?

Washington’s discipline rules also:

  • Encourage schools to minimize suspensions and expulsions and focus on evidence-based approaches that keep students engaged in learning.
  • Prohibit exclusion because of absences or tardiness.
  • Require absences related to mental health to be excused.
  • Limit exclusionary discipline for behaviors that do not present a safety threat.
  • Require educational services during suspensions and expulsions.

What Counts as a Removal From School?

Any disciplinary action that takes a student away from their regular educational placement can count as a removal from school.

Examples of removals include:

  • Out-of-school suspension
  • In-school suspension
  • Expulsion
  • Emergency removal
  • Removal from class, activities, or part of the school day because of behavior

These actions are also referred to as exclusionary discipline because they remove a student from some or all of their educational program.

Repeated requests to pick up a student early can result in significant missed instruction. Understanding how these removals are affecting the student’s school day can start with a few key questions:

  • How much instruction is my child missing?
  • Are these removals being documented?
  • Why is my child being removed instead of receiving additional support?
  • Does my child need an evaluation, new accommodations, or additional services?

A shortened school day should not be an automatic response to behavior challenges. Before reducing a student’s school day, schools should consider whether additional supports, services, accommodations, instruction, or behavioral interventions could help the student participate successfully in a full day.

If the school reduces a student’s schedule because of behavior, the change could be considered a suspension. OCR’s guidance points out that a shortened school day is an example of a significant change of placement, and that placement changes require a re-evaluation process.

What Rights Continue During Suspensions and Other Removals?

A student’s right to education does not end because of a disciplinary removal. Washington law requires schools to provide educational services during suspensions, expulsions, and emergency removals (WAC 392-400-610). Educational services should help students continue participating in the general education curriculum and making educational progress.

When a student is suspended or expelled, families have the right to ask how educational services will continue, including:

  • What educational services will be provided?
  • How will instruction be delivered?
  • How will assignments be completed?
  • Who should we contact with questions?
  • How will progress be monitored?

Educational services provided in an alternative setting must enable the student to:

  • Continue to participate in the general education curriculum
  • Meet the educational standards established within the district
  • Complete subject, grade-level, and graduation requirements.

Schools must report disciplinary and emergency removals to both the parent or guardian and the state. Written notice must include:

  • A description of the student’s behavior and how it violated district discipline policy.
  • The length of the suspension or expulsion.
  • Information about educational services.
  • Information about the right to request a conference.
  • Information about appeal rights.

The school district must provide notice in a language the student and parent or guardian can understand, including interpretation or translation when needed (WAC 392-400-455). 

What Happens When Families Disagree With a School’s Decision?

Families have the right to ask questions and request information when they disagree with disciplinary actions, evaluation decision, placement change, or denial of services.

Requests may include:

  • Written notice explaining the decision
  • School records related to the incident
  • An evaluation or reevaluation
  • An IEP or Section 504 meeting
  • An FBA or BIP
  • Information about educational services
  • Information about available appeal or dispute-resolution options

Washington’s discipline rules include procedures for notice, conferences, review, and appeals. Students receiving special education services may also have additional protections when disciplinary removals become lengthy or repeated.

When families disagree with decisions about evaluation, services, placement, or discipline, federal and state laws provide rights and dispute-resolution options. PAVE’s articles on dispute resolution and procedural safeguards offer practical guidance for understanding available options and next steps.

If a concern involves disability discrimination, an Office for Civil Rights (OCR) complaint may also be an option.

Learn More

The Governor’s Office of the Education Ombuds (OEO) provides information about Discipline, Suspensions, and Expulsions, and options for resolving concerns when families disagree with school decisions.

Schools are guided by the state to use best practices when evaluating and serving students with special needs. OSPI’s Model Forms for Services to Students in Special Education webpage has links to downloadable forms schools use to develop IEPs, Section 504 Plans, and more, including:

PAVE provides a Behavioral Health Toolkit that includes a video to support development of a Behavior Intervention Plan (BIP).

The Office of Special Education Programs (OSEP) issued guidance in July 2022 that describes federal work underway to improve behavioral supports and reduce disciplinary removal of students receiving special education services. OSEP’s Dear Colleague Letter includes links to a Q and A document about disciplinary requirements and A Guide for Stakeholders.

Tips to Help Parents Reinforce Positive Behaviors at Home

Posted on by Nicol Walsh

Changes in routine, especially during school breaks, can be challenging for families, but using Positive Behavioral Interventions and Supports (PBIS) at home can help create calm, structure, and stronger relationships. PBIS focuses on teaching expected behaviors, using clear communication, and reinforcing positive actions instead of relying on punishment. Families can build supportive routines, model emotional regulation, and use simple strategies to guide behavior at home.

A Brief Overview

  • Positive Behavioral Interventions and Supports (PBIS) is a strategy schools use to teach children about expected behavior.
  • A key PBIS principle is that punishment fails to teach what to do instead. Adults can model calm responses and self-regulation with tools like self-care and mindfulness.
  • Behavior is a form of communication. When children act out, they may be trying to express a need, feeling, or frustration they don’t yet have the words for.
  • The easiest way to change a behavior is to point out what a person does right. Remember this catchy phrase, “5-and-1 gets it done,” to ensure five positive interactions for each negative interaction.
  • Families can use school-based PBIS strategies at home to create safe, consistent, and predictable environments.
  • PAVE provides a video with key information to help families and schools analyze a child’s behavior and develop a positive behavior support plan: Behavior and School: How to Participate in the FBA/BIP Process.
  • If you come up with some great behavior support strategies this summer, be sure to share them with the school in the fall!

Introduction

Changes in routine and seasonal transitions can cause emotional upheaval for families. A few strategies, described below, might help families keep things chill this summer and beyond.

These ideas come from education, where research has helped teachers see the benefits from using Positive Behavioral Interventions and Supports (PBIS). PBIS has been implemented in more than 26,000 U.S. schools. The PBIS framework has been shown to decrease disciplinary removals and improve student outcomes, including grades and graduation rates. When done well, PBIS provides positive social skills, communication strategies and “restorative justice,” (working it out instead of punishing) and may prevent 80-90 percent of problem behaviors.

PBIS is often part of a broader approach called Multi-Tiered System of Supports (MTSS), which helps schools and families work together to meet academic, behavioral, and emotional needs through different levels of support.

Positive support makes learning easier

PBIS research highlights problems with punishments, which are called “aversive interventions.” Research shows that a punished child is likely to go into an emotionally dysregulated state (fight/flight/freeze) that actually blocks learning. Chances are low that the child will know what to do next time because the punishment didn’t provide a learning opportunity.

PBIS teaches what to do instead – and how to do it. Adults who calmly guide children and youth toward a new way of problem-solving can interrupt or prevent an escalation and help the child make better and better choices moving forward.

Keep in mind that adults need to stay regulated to help children. PAVE provides resources to help adults work on their own self-control and support their children:

Behavior is a child’s attempt to communicate

Simple, consistent, predictable language is critical for teaching and reinforcing behavior, says Kelcey Schmitz, who works for the University of Washington School Mental Health Assessment, Research, and Training (SMART) Center.

“PBIS is a game changer for children and youth with behavior challenges and their teachers and caregivers,” Schmitz says. “In fact, everyone can benefit from PBIS. Behavior is a form of communication, and PBIS aims to reduce problem behavior by increasing appropriate behavior and ultimately improving quality of life for everyone. The same approaches used by schools to prevent problem behaviors and create positive, safe, consistent and predictable environments can be used by families at home.”

Schmitz, an MTSS training and technical assistance specialist, provides the following specific tips for creating a successful PBIS home environment.

Support Positive Behavior before there is a problem

PBIS is set up with three layers – called tiers – of support. The parent-child relationship is strengthened by loving and positive interactions at each level.

Tier 1 support is about getting busy before there is a problem. Much like learning to wash hands to prevent getting sick, expected behavior is taught and modeled to prevent unexpected behaviors.  Parents can look at their own actions and choices and consider what children will see as examples of being respectful, responsible, and safe.

Tiers 2 and 3 are where adults provide more support for specific behaviors that are getting in the way of relationships or how the child or youth functions. In a school setting, Tier 2 is for students who need a social group or some extra teaching, practice, and reinforcement.

Tier 3 support includes a Functional Behavioral Assessment (FBA) to find out why the behavior is occurring, and an individualized Behavior Intervention Plan (BIP). PAVE provides a video: Behavior and School: How to Participate in the FBA/BIP Process.

Any student may access supports that include aspects of Social Emotional Learning at all three Tiers. At home, Tiers 2 and 3 naturally will be more blended and may include support from a community provider. Note that targeted interventions in Tiers 2-3 work best when Tier 1 is already well established.

Define, teach, and routinely acknowledge family expectations

Discuss how you want to live as a family and identify some “pillars” (important, building-block concepts) that represent what you value. Talk about what those pillars look, and sound like in everyday routines. To help the family remember and be consistent, choose only 3-5 and create positive statements about them. Here are a few examples:

  • Speak in a respectful voice.
  • Be responsible for your actions.
  • Be safe; keep hands, feet, and objects to self.

Identify a couple of “hot spots” to begin. Challenging behaviors often occur within routines. Perhaps mornings or mealtimes create hot spots for the family. After discussing 1-2 ways to be respectful, responsible, and safe in the morning, teach what each looks like. Have fun with it! Set up “expectation stations” for practicing the plan and assign each family member one pillar to teach to the rest.

Behaviors that get attention get repeated. Notice when a child does the right thing and say something about each success: “I noticed you stopped to pick up your shoes in the hallway. Thanks for putting them away and keeping the walkway safe for others.” The easiest way to change a behavior is to point out what a person does right!

Remember this catchy phrase, “5-and-1 gets it done” to ensure five positive interactions for each negative interaction. When the expected behavior becomes routine, the reinforcement can fade away.

Create engaging and predictable routines

Children crave structure and routine. Adults may look forward to a relaxing evening or weekend, but kids often need regular activity and engagement. Consider that either the kids are busy, or the adults are busy managing bored kids!

Use visuals to create predictability. A visual schedule can display major routines of the day with pictures that are drawn, real photos, or cut-outs from magazines. Create a schedule together, if possible.  Parents can ask a child to check the schedule – especially when moving from a preferred to non-preferred activity. It’s hard to argue with a picture!

Set the stage for positive behavior

Teach, pre-teach, and re-teach. Children need to learn behavior just like they learn colors and shapes. A quick reminder can help reinforce a developing skill: “When we get in the car, sit up, buckle up, and smile!”

Give transition warnings or cues to signal the end of one activity and the beginning of another: “In five minutes, it will be bath time.”

First/then statements set up a child for delayed gratification: “First take your bath; then we can play dolls.”

Focus on Go instead of Stop. Children often tune out words like No, Don’t and Stop and only hear the word that comes next, which is what an adult is trying to avoid. Tell a child what to do instead of what not to do: “Take your plate and put it in the sink.” Save Stop and No for dangerous circumstances that need a quick reaction.

Choices prevent power struggles: “Would you rather play for five more minutes or get in the bath now?”  “Feel free to choose the pink pajamas or the green ones.”

While these strategies may not eliminate all problem behaviors, they create consistency, predictability, and a more positive atmosphere. They teach new skills to help children get their needs met. The solid foundation will help even if challenging behaviors persist by creating a bedrock for additional layers of support.

Final Thoughts

Supporting positive behavior at home doesn’t require perfection—just patience, consistency, and a willingness to learn alongside your child. By using clear communication, setting routines, and teaching expected behaviors, families can create a calm and connected environment where everyone thrives. These strategies not only make summer smoother but also build skills that carry into the school year. If you come up with some great behavior support strategies this summer, be sure to share them with the school in the fall! Working together, families and schools can create strong, supportive systems that help every child succeed.

Learn More

Ideas and Resources to Support Your Child’s Behavior at School

Posted on by Nicol Walsh

A Brief Overview

  • Behavior specialists generally agree that difficult behaviors arise from unmet needs. How adults respond is critical if a child is going to learn new ways to communicate.
  • Humans spend about 80 percent of their brain energy trying to belong. This can explain a lot when a child with a disability feels isolated or unwanted and starts to act out.
  • Positive Behavior Interventions and Supports (PBIS) is a framework that a growing number of schools nationwide are using to improve school climate, which refers to the way a school feels to students and staff.
  • Members of the U.S. Congress discussed PBIS on February 27, 2019, when a committee heard public testimony regarding a bill that would regulate use of isolation and restraint in public schools. Positive behavior interventions are considered “protective” by behavior experts, and there is evidence that isolation and restraint cause trauma.
  • Read on for questions families can consider when they are trying to understand what’s happening with a child and how to intervene for the best outcomes.

Full Article

Families and teachers often struggle to figure out what to do when a child’s behavior at school is getting in the way of learning.  How adults respond to unexpected behavior can impact whether an incident leads down a path of worsening problems or toward improved learning. Parents can help by understanding as much as possible about what the child might be trying to communicate or overcome.

“Difficult behaviors result from unmet needs,” says David Pitonyak, PhD, an educational consultant, author and public speaker who specializes in behavior supports for children with disabilities. Pitonyak speaks nationally and provides a variety of online tools to help families and educators.

One example is a free, online presentation, “All Behavior is Meaning-full.” In it, Pitonyak includes a list of what might be missing when an unmet need leads to a behavior incident:

  • Meaningful relationships
  • A sense of safety and well-being
  • Power
  • Things to look forward to
  • A sense of value and self-worth
  • Relevant skills and knowledge

“Supporting a person requires us to get to know the person as a complicated human being influenced by a complex personal history,” Pitonyak says. “While it is tempting to look for a quick fix, which usually means attacking the person and his or her behavior, suppressing behavior without understanding something about the life the person is living is disrespectful and counterproductive….

“Our challenge is to find out what the person needs so that we can be more supportive.”

A running theme in Pitonyak’s work is that adults need to strengthen their own social and emotional skills in order to effectively help children. He often quotes another specialist in the field, Jean Clark: “A person’s needs are best met by people whose needs are met.” In other words, parents and teachers need to practice self-care and regulate their own behaviors and emotions to provide the best examples to children. Read on for a check-list that adults can use to develop their own skills while they help children.

A brain’s biggest job is to belong

Pitonyak is among specialists who believe that children act out because they feel misunderstood, devalued, lonely or powerless. Other growing themes are the importance of belonging and the human need to contribute meaningfully to a social group. Neuroscientists have found that humans spend about 80 percent of their brain energy trying to belong. This can explain a lot when a child with a disability feels isolated or unwanted and starts to act out.

Parents can use these concepts in a variety of ways to participate in their child’s educational program. Here are examples of questions to ask in any meeting with a school:

  • Who are the adults at school that my child trusts?
  • Does my child have special jobs or responsibilities, so he/she feels important at school?
  • Is someone regularly checking in with my child to see what’s going on?
  • How are positive behavior skills being taught and reinforced?

Positive Behavior Interventions and Supports (PBIS) is a framework that a growing number of schools nationwide are using to improve “school climate,” which refers to the way a school feels to its students and staff.

Schools that embrace PBIS generally create programs to help all students participate in well-being and then offer more targeted social, emotional and behavioral help to students who struggle the most. These different levels of intervention are called Multi-Tiered Systems of Support (MTSS). According to the federal PBIS website, “PBIS improves social, emotional and academic outcomes for all students, including students with disabilities and students from underrepresented groups.”

Information about federal guidelines and programs related to PBIS and MTSS are available online from the U.S. Department of Education’s Office of Special Education Programs (OSEP) and the Office of Elementary and Secondary Education (OESE). PAVE provides an article about PBIS, with parenting tips by Kelcey Schmitz, a longtime MTSS expert who previously worked for OSPI and now is part of the University of Washington’s School of Medicine and the School Mental Health Assessment, Research, & Training (SMART) Center.

PBIS is a protective strategy

The United States Congressional Committee on Education and Labor received training about PBIS on February 27, 2019, when they heard public testimony (YouTube video): Classrooms in Crisis: Examining the Inappropriate Use of Seclusion and Restraint Practices. Congress is considering legislation that would create a federal standard on accepted practice, accountability and training for teachers who might use isolation or restraint in an emergency.

National Public Radio reported about isolation and restraint in a June 5, 2019, broadcast that included personal comments from two families in Vancouver, Washington.

The State of Washington allows isolation and restraint by trained school staff if a student’s behavior poses an imminent threat of serious bodily harm. PAVE’s comprehensive article about discipline at school includes more information and resources about isolation and restraint, which is described by state law as an emergency response and not a form of disciplinary action.

Among those who provided public testimony for the U.S. Congress was George Sugai, PhD, professor of special education at the University of Connecticut who was a key developer of the PBIS framework. At the public hearing, Sugai spoke about the reduction in trauma among schools who embrace PBIS. He said teachers report more positive feelings toward their work and that students show more progress toward specific educational goals. “PBIS is a protective strategy,” he said.

The behavior itself holds the clues about what to do next

Sugai, who holds a Master of Arts and a PhD in special education from the University of Washington, spoke about understanding a child’s unmet needs. “We have to understand what children are communicating through their behavior,” he said. “The behavior itself holds the clues about what to do next.”

Washington’s Office of Superintendent of Public Instruction (OSPI), which oversees the state’s school districts, has a variety of programs underway to address school climate and improve staff training in Social Emotional Learning, equity in student discipline and development of Compassionate Schools. The state encourages use of a Behavior Intervention Plan (BIP), which promotes positive support and skill-building for expected school behavior. The plan is to prevent the need for disciplinary action or emergency response. A BIP is developed with data collected through a Functional Behavior Analysis (FBA), which is a best-practice tool for schools to figure out what help a student with challenging behavior might need. OSPI’s website includes examples of the FBA and BIP in its Model Forms.

OSPI’s family and community liaison, Scott Raub, partnered with a special services director from the Puget Sound’s Educational Service District 121 to create a slide presentation about isolation and restraint that is available as a free, downloadable PDF. The document is titled, Stop Using Restraint and Isolation: An Evolution or a REVOLUTION? The presentation includes specific guidance for school staff to use a Behavior Intervention Plan (BIP) as a strategy for managing behavior. A flow chart shows how early intervention might diffuse a situation to allow a student to remain in a more regulated state and stay in class. The document also provides detail about recent OSPI rulings about isolation and restraint raised through the Citizen’s Complaint process.

In accordance with the Revised Code of Washington (RCW 28A.600.485), “Restraint or isolation of any student is permitted only when reasonably necessary to control spontaneous behavior that poses an imminent likelihood of serious harm. Restraint or isolation must be closely monitored to prevent harm to the student, and must be discontinued as soon as the likelihood of serious harm has dissipated. Each school district shall adopt a policy providing for the least amount of restraint or isolation appropriate to protect the safety of students and staff under such circumstances.”

In the slide presentation, designed for schools and publicly available, OSPI provides detail about what “imminent likelihood of serious harm” can look like and provides direct guidance to staff, including these statements:

  • Emergency Response Protocols are NOT a substitute for BIPs.
  • BIPs must be updated as part of student’s annual IEP [review].
  • The time to end isolation and restraint is as soon as the likelihood of serious harm has dissipated; this is not equivalent to waiting until the student has calmed.

A state workgroup to study Social Emotional Learning (SEL) in October 2016 proposed a set of Standards and Benchmarks to help school staff identify how best to help children who struggle with their behavior, social skills and emotional regulation. The group established six standards with specific benchmarks. A report from that workgroup includes a chart of the standards (Page 3). Families can share this information with schools when trying to identify what’s happening with a child and what interventions might help.

Below is a brief overview of those SEL standards and a few questions parents can bring to the table. In each target area, parents can ask what school staff are doing to help. This check-list also can be a good starting-point for adults who want to work on their own emotional regulation and coping strategies.

1. Self-Awareness

  • Can the student identify and understand emotions?
  • What is the student good at or interested in?
  • How are family, school and community agencies helping as a team?

2.Self-Management

  • Can the student express emotions and manage stress constructively?
  • What problem-solving skills are in place or need to be learned?

3. Self-Efficacy (self-motivated/seeing self as capable)

  • Can the student understand and work toward a goal?
  • Can the student show problem-solving skills?
  • Can the student request what he/she needs?

4. Social Awareness

  • Can the student recognize another person’s emotions?
  • Can the student show respect for others who are different?
  • Can the student accept another cultural perspective?

5. Social Management

  • Does the student have ways to communicate?
  • Can the student take steps to resolve conflicts with other people?
  • Does the student have constructive relationships with a variety of people?

6. Social Engagement

  • Does the student feel responsibility as part of a community?
  • Can the student work with others to achieve a goal?
  • Does the student contribute productively and recognize his/her contribution?

Additional Resources

PAVE provides a series of three articles with more information and resources about Social Emotional Learning (SEL).

Many parents struggle in their communications with the school when a child’s specific disability and its impact on behavior is not well understood. A place to research specific disabilities related to mental health, such as Oppositional Defiance Disorder (ODD), Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder (ADHD) or Disruptive Mood Dysregulation Disorder (DMDD) is the Child Mind Institute.

A resource for better understanding how children might behave in response to trauma or Adverse Childhood Experiences (ACEs) is the Children’s Health Foundation.

An agency called GoZen offers an online article about Eight Ways a Child’s Anxiety Shows up at Something Else. Included in the list: difficulty sleeping, anger, defiance, lack of focus, avoidance, negativity, over-planning and “chandeliering,” which refers to a full-blown tantrum that seemingly comes out of nowhere. In addition to its free online articles, GoZen provides fee-based programs on resilience.